I bitch a lot about wizard rock on IRC.  Nobody, of course, wants to hear it, so I figure this way I can express it and nobody will.

Anyone who’s likely to read this post already knows what wizard rock is.  For anyone who doesn’t, it’s a sub-genre of filk, which is a musical meta-genre derived from the word “folk” that includes any music tied to some kind of sci-fi or fantasy.  A very well-known (and rare good form, in my opinion) example of filk is the Star Wars Gangsta Rap.  Go look it up if you’ve never seen it (it’s part of a Flash animation).  I suspect the reason I’m attracted to that song is that it’s good parody that refuses to take itself or anything else seriously, and I love parody.  And the song is actually well done.

What bothers me about filk in general is that it’s ridiculously artificial, and a lot of it is a miserable attempt at instant nostalgia ala this decade’s sorry parade of genre parody movies (Epic Movie, Meet the Spartans, Superhero Movie, etc) that all suck.  You cannot create instant nostalgia.  What’s worse is when it sucks already and you’re trying to ride on the coattails of something hugely successful.  See my earlier comment about recent genre parody movies.

Which brings me to wizard rock.  Harry Potter filk, for the uninitiated.

In my (carefully and intentionally) limited experience, I’ve never come across wizard rock that had any chance of standing on its merits as music.  That is, it’s invariably the bad type of filk – it’s centered on a recent work of fiction, and it’s terrible, terrible quality as a work of art.

And when it comes down to it, Harry Potter is a kids’ series.  I’m not going to get into how the plot is simple and shallow, because as much as I can critique it, It’s a good story.  But it’s a kids’ book.  Let me break it down for you: you’re going to concerts and buying CDs of lousy music performed by people with no exceptional musical skill except maybe the ability to fit “Voldemort” and “Hermione” into this or that meter.  You look like a fool.

Hey, if that’s your thing that’s cool.  Fans of wizard rock don’t offend me (although they do have a tendancy to be rabid about it, which is annoying), and there’s much worse.  At least you’re not wearing your pants around halfway down your damn thighs.  That is offensive.